Unbearable lightness: a story of loss and gain by Portia de Rossi
Book Review by Miriam Stone
There seems to be a glut of autobiographies on the market and every celebrity has a secret that has to be told right now. I have wondered why some of these secrets have to come out at all. Mackenzie Phillips said she was truly cleansed when she revealed that she had sex with her father for ten years. But, her family wasn’t so happy and I’m sure they didn’t get any of the financial profits from the sale of the book. But, Mackenzie did. And if you don’t like her secret, Ashley Judd has one and so does her sister. Rob Lowe and Meredith Baxter wrote books this year and books were written about Michael Jackson and Keith Richard.
And then we have Portia de Rossi. She has written a beautiful book holding nothing back. She does reveal her fears about getting fat, her fear about being outed as a homosexual, but she does it in a way that bares her very soul and almost makes it painful to read this small book. Portia’s Clearfield Co Pub Lib fears about gaining weight are so extreme that she diets herself down to 80 pounds. She makes not only a meal of a stick of chewing gum, she makes it her whole days intake of food. And then she runs in order to lose the few calories she gained from the gum.
Her body suffers to the point that her organs begin to shut down. She harms her liver so bad that she begins to suffer from cirrhosis. She develops lupus, an autoimmune disease. But, she still feels the need to control her body and if dieting isn’t enough, then bulimia will be the next step.
She finally stops starving herself and her weight goes to 165 pounds. During this period she meets Ellen. She is drawn to her but it takes a few years for them to finally get together. She and Ellen are married and she credits Ellen with helping her to look at who she is and become comfortable in her body. She has become a spokeswoman for gay rights and women’s health issues.
Portia holds nothing back and takes a dark issue out into the light. I am so impressed with this book and with the author that I think it can become a great source of information for parents of children with eating disorders. I also think that any girl who has this problem will find a greater understanding of themselves through Portia de Rossi and what she has to say, than through any other source material.
She also addresses the issue of a girl who tries hard to view the world as a heterosexual when her eyes can only see everything as a homosexual. She lives in total fear that she will be found out in Hollywood and she will never work again. Indeed she marries a man and tries to live a heterosexual lifestyle for three years. When she finally comes out, she only wants to come out quietly so she won’t have to face her parents and tell them. Young people, not just girls, will identify with the incredible desire to live their real lives and the fear of how to do just that. Portia talks about the day she marries Ellen and her mother is there helping her with her wedding dress and her mother tells her that she is so proud of her.
This is a book of pain and fear, but it is ultimately a tale of hope and happiness. It is a book to be read.
